Reminiscence & Ruminations

Time flies,
We grow wise
By embracing the lows and highs
&by cherishing the smiles and cries

Life is no game of dice
For we ought to pay the price
For our virtues and vice

Memories we stack
And progresses we track
Which equips us with the right knack
To improve what we truly lack

The shackles of fear that we dare to break
Fine tunes the intuitive decisions we make

Life after all is a zero sum game meant to come full circle!

On an absolutely lazy weekend, having watched The Shawshank Redemption for the third time, totally motivated with “Get busy living or get busy dying” –  a firm decision was made to run away literally! Of course with my running shoes and gear on as running makes me feel alive. Seeing an ambulance enter a retirement village, a thought crossed my mind - someone unfortunately is busy dying. As I continued to run on the footpath, a BMW jolted to a halt a few inches away right in front of me. It was an old man taking reverse from parking space with a petrified look of the possibility of running over a runner. A narrow miss of my tombstone which could have read “The one who died while deciding to get busy living!” 

Life!

Life is funny

Life is seriousness

Life is silly

Life is risky

Life is freedom

Life is confinement

Life is happiness

Life is sadness

Life is a surprisingly strange journey!

Life indeed is what you choose to be!

Change!

We are so attuned to clinging on what is familiar to us that we often despise what is unfamiliar at the moment. We dread change! We cocoon ourselves when it actually is the time to spread our wings wide and fly. They say "familiarity breeds contempt", if such is the case then why are we always dreadful about losing what we are familiar with and taking decisions which would require stepping out of our comfort zone?. Is it because 'obscurity breads fear'?. We are culture bound. Though our country brags about "unity in diversity", as an individual,deep inside we are apprehensive about diversity.We fear to face and accept if anything around us differs from what has been ingrained in our mind.

Sometimes even though our mind is game for something novel and unusual in contrast to our societal norms, we restrain ourselves and tread the path that has been followed and accepted by majority. The main reason behind our restraint is the fear of getting ostracized, the frightfulness of getting cut off from roots and having to let go off familiarity.When there is a situation which demands change, there can be two kinds of reaction - acceptance or rejection. When you accept the situation, initially there will be a lot of inner turmoil to deal with. However if there is rejection, the turmoil persists not just initially but for great deal of time. Instead of dealing with the change positively by accepting the situation as is and doing our best to keep cool, most of the people adopt fight or flight mode. If one decides to fight and stop the change from being implemented, the circumastance worsens and the situation becomes more agitated.If one chooses a 'flight' mode, then the conscience pricks every single moment and regret and repent becomes a part and parcel of the life. 'Out of sight is out of mind' is cliched and is not true in all cases. One should always be brave enough to confront the situation at hand by accepting wholeheartedly changes that are beyond ones control.

When it is time to change,

Situation definitely seems strange,

Do not let yourself be ruled by rage,

Let go of the self created mental blockage,

For the change is an opportunity in disguise which demands mindset of a new range.

Happiness!

Happiness is that positive and imperceptible spark of energy, achieving which is the ultimate goal of human existence.We yearn to be happy and make a list of 'if and then' scenarios in our minds.These finite set of mental mapping encompass our life's priorities. Each and every action and reaction in our life are by products of these 'if and then' mind analysis. The person acquires and makes a bunch of such scenarios either through his own experiences or by observing others around. Eventually they act as a guiding light in his/her life. A pure case of bounded rationality. You felt happy shopping a new dress and pair of shoes, then a trigger registers, and an inner voice guides you next time when you are sad, it screams 'Go shopping'! How much can one accumulate? There has to be a saturation point. This materialistic way of feeding one's inner peace is short lived and definitely evasive. Our mind works strangely and a lot of conscious effort is needed to tame it. The upbringing of a child forms a vital source of this so called 'if and then' repository at the early stages of his/her life. What parents regard as important, what they would value the most and for what the children would have been rewarded the most etc., all of these become a part of the child's repository. Some would want to live their dreams through their children. So they assume all that they were deprived of which would have made them happy and given a better life, they start providing to their children and expect them to be happy and indebted for bringing them up thus nipping the bud before it blossoms. The child's mind frame gets modeled by the whims and fancies of  parents during early childhood. When they start schooling, the real 'nature vs nurture' struggle begins. Parent's and teacher's expectations, peer pressure overshadows ones real talent and interests. A widely accepted yardstick of "the more you succeed in pleasing others, the more happy you can be" gets imbibed and they start having a facade to please the gawkers of their life. This builds a false perception about life's purpose and makes the person a 'prisoner of gawkers's expectations'. Can happiness really exist in captivity? I highly doubt it, for happiness is elusive! 

To realize what it is to be happy and content, all that we need is to avoid aping or detesting others and being our own selves doing what we are good at.


Share your joys and sorrows, smile more, be empathitic, be happy! 

Mixed Bag!

A wish changes nothing,
But a firm decision to change stops at nothing!

Grass always seems greener on the other side,
Which blinds us from the opportunities on our side!

One joy shatters many a grief.
Yet there is no pain so great as the memory of joy in present grief!

Happiness is a choice that requires effort,
Getting rid off inevitable sorrows also requires effort!

Be it Choice or Destiny, success is determined by your attitude
It’s the little thing that makes the big diff –your attitude!

Every accomplishment starts with the decision to try,
Better to try and fail, but never fail to try!

Procrastination is the thief of time,
Time is precious. You can make money and buy everything but time!

Be Happy!!! :)

Rambling thoughts!

Some secrets are hidden and unknown to the rest,
Powerful enough to seep the inner zest.

Tolerated are some of the lies,
Forgotten are the rest as the time flies.

All worlds-inner and outer changes,
The impact manifest in different ranges.

To be accepted, actions become mere pretense,
I wonder if it can be considered an offense or is it an act of defense?

Days, many a time bring pains,
In disguise, it reap so many gains.

Mere words bring grief,
When explained and understood, there is so much relief.

Each one of us carry a bundle of sins,
When realized and regretted, a new life begins.

So much left to learn,
Instead we imagine the impossible and yearn.

A new day, a new thought, a new experience to carry,
Amongst which some of it you bury.

Each day leaves behind a new story,
Which may turn out to be the road to permanent glory.

Be Happy!!! :)

'Favour bank'....cynical side of it!!

Personal interpretation about the concept called favour bank of Paulo coelho's 'The Zahir' :

-Unlike the regular banks,in case of Favour Bank you deposit favours and expect counter favours for interest!Favours can have many manifestation viz a little act of rendering small help or uttering a few good words about you or giving compliments.All these get accumulated in a virtual account and your conscience is indebted to repay it all though you do not whole-heartedly want to or willing to do so.Many a times it so happens that people would want to act according to their own whims and fancies but try to have a blind eye towards their own thought process and portray themselves differently fearing that favour bank policy is a rule meant not to be broken and their social image might be at stake if they do so!.....Though it sounds pretty cynical,it is so very true that "favours are expectations personified" and tend to guide our actions and reactions at some point of time.

Be Happy!!! :)

“Life is a stage……..”

Act Vs Enact
People either write their own script and act as though they are the masters of their world and can risk anything and care no more for others opinion or tend to follow the script others would have written.

Expression Vs Impression!!
People either act to impress others whom they would like to be associated with or express their true self not considering about the so called “image” that they portray and claim to possess.

Draw Vs Paint
People either draw freely upon their own imagination on their own canvas or borrow others drawing and just fill in paint on it.

Expect Vs Accept:
People either expect things to happen confidently in a self-fulfilling prophecy or assume that “Life works out-but not as you expect it” and hence accept conditions as they exist.

Aware Vs Appear
People frame a picture about others with the aid of an invisible sense called intuition guiding them on the basis of what others expect from them or what they can accept from others.A few others judge based on the external appearance, be it a feigning smile or concern.

Change Vs Manage
People either believe that “Change is the essence of life” and will be willing to surrender what they are for what they could become. Or people label everything as inevitable and manage living the way the flow goes.

Be Happy!!! :)

Be Thankful...!!!

Be thankful that you don't already have
everything you desire.
If you did,what would there be
to look forward to?

Be thankful when you don't know something
for it gives you the opportunity to learn.
Be thankful for the difficult times;
during those times you grow.

Be thankful for your limitations,
because they give you
opportunities for improvement.
Be thankful for the new challenge,
because it will build your
strength and character.

Be thankful for your mistakes;
they will teach you valuable lessons.
Be thankful when you are tired and weary,
because it means you have made a difference.

Be thankful for the setbacks.
Gratitude can turn a negative into a positive.
Find a way to be thankful for your troubles,
and they can become your blessings.

Courtesy:Wisdom,May 2007 issue

Be Happy!!! :-)